The Importance of Your Human-Cat Bond

Owning and caring for a cat has long been hailed as therapeutic for those who are alone, anxious, depressed, under stress, or in recovery. Research has suggested that pet ownership positively influences your emotional state and health. 

Interacting with your cat interrupts your stressful thoughts in part because your pet offers you the opportunity for the most basic, necessary, and nurturing form of communication: touch. Having a cat is having "someone" to care for and about - a special someone who cares about you back. This gives meaning to your life and spurs you to keep going on.  

Cat companionship influences you positively and directly in social situations as well. People with animals are thought to be friendlier, happier, more hardworking, and intelligent. 

Why is Your Cat So Important to You?

Your cat offers you happiness and wholehearted caring because it

* Accepts and loves you unconditionally.

* Provides you with an ever-ready smile.

* Listens to you attentively.

* Encourages you to share your sadness and joy.

* Touches you and savors your touch.

* Distracts you with when you are feeling low.

* Remains your loyal friend and enthusiastic playmate.

* Impacts you physically, emotionally, psychically, and spiritually.

Your cat meets many of your emotional needs.

What Happens When Your Cat Leaves You?

You have had a cherished relationship with your cat. Your cat has been a significant and vital part of your life. So when you lose this special bond - 
by accident, chronic illness, or death - you may suffer nearly overwhelming 
grief, pain, and loss.

What are Grief and Recovery?

Grief is when you experience a deep, wide hole in your life ... in your heart. Things have changed radically and negatively. What you have been doing and enjoying with your beloved cat you are no longer doing. 

You are reaching out for someone who has always been there and has always been a special and integral part of your life. But now, when you need them one more time, they are no longer there.

Recovery, on the other hand, is when you are able to put the loss and grief in perspective. You begin to feel a little better and a little more in control. That is, you are getting to a point where you are not crying all the time, thinking "if only I'd done X or Y instead." You are getting to the point where you can enjoy the fondest memories of your cat companion without having to suffer the painfully sharp feelings of remorse and regret. 

You are discovering that it is okay for you to continue to feel twinges of sadness and miss your cat's personality, antics, and love. You need to and want to talk about your cat and your life with it. You will start to find new meaning in what your cat contributed to your life and how you are a much better person for having known your companion, despite your seeming all-too-brief time together.

Recovery means your stepping back and seeing your loss in a new way. No longer something to be sad about but something to be glad about. You had the rare opportunity to share life with someone who unconditionally loved you. Irrespective of the time you and your companion were together, your cat gave you something exquisitely special that significantly enhanced you life ... for which you are truly grateful.  

What Makes Expressing Your Grief So Hard?

Expressing your grief about the loss of your cat companion is not easy. Our society tends to trivialize pet loss and, thus, the deep relationship it represents. Too often you hear friends, family, and strangers alike saying dismissively, "It was only a cat." Or, "You can always get another one." Not everyone values non-human beings or can understand why others do and what it means.

Frequently other people find speaking about grief and loss to be awkward. They would prefer not to have to deal with it. And even those who understand what this loss means to you may struggle with saying something comforting. Instead, they may say nothing. Also, too often there are few local resources available to address this kind of loss.

While reading pet loss books is helpful, talking and sharing with someone who is sensitive, empathetic, and experienced in helping with pet loss can make all the difference in how well you deal with it.

The result is the same. You are left in isolation with few ways to share your intense feelings of shock and disbelief, denial, anger, guilt, and despair—with altered patterns of sleep, eating, and energy. Sometimes you may feel you have to hide or deny your grief because others consider it unacceptable. But doing so only buries the hurt, putting you at risk of prolonging your pain and your healing process.

What Can Make Grieving Less Hard?

At this most delicate time what you need is an understanding and empathetic ear, support, guidance, and the experience and expertise of a pet loss professional. This is someone who intimately knows the pain and grief of saying "good-bye" and can help you work through your loss, make the necessary decisions, and honor and pay tribute to the memory of your beloved cat.

Imagine what a relief that would be!

Where Can You Find a Pet Loss Professional?

Signe A. Dayhoff, Ph.D., can help you. For over 27 years I have been a Social Psychologist, Cat Communicator, Applied Cat Behaviorist, Life Coach, Cat Companion, and Pet Loss Consultant. I have provided Pet Loss Support Groups and Consultation in conjunction with homeless animals rescue organizations, such as CARMA (Companion Animal Rescue and Medical Assistance) and Placitas Animal Rescue.

What Exactly Does Pet Loss Support & Consulting Do?

It helps you 

* Acknowledge the extent of your grief, loss, and confusion.

* Share your pain with someone who is understanding, caring, and compassionate.

* Discover how to effectively focus on your specific issues at each stage of bereavement.

* Give yourself permission to grieve and share your grief.

* Make necessary pet loss-related decisions.

* Celebrate your cat and keep its memory alive and strong.

* Achieve release, acceptance, and finally peace.

How is Pet Loss Consulting Done?

Pet Loss Consulting is done by phone wherein you call me at a scheduled time. It is $50 for 30 minutes. One session per week is the minimum recommended schedule for working through pet loss. If you wish to commit ahead of time to four (4) 30-minute sessions per month, the per-month fee is $175. 

For a limited time:

100% of Pet Loss Consulting Fees Will Be Donated to CARMA.

Payment is to be by check made out to CARMA and sent to: Dr. Signe A. Dayhoff, P.O. Box 340, Placitas, NM 87043. (To see more about CARMA)

For consulting on a per-session basis, payment is due prior to each session. For consulting on a monthly basis, payment for the month is due prior to the first session of that month. Day time and evening hours are available from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. Mountain Time.

But How Will I Know Pet Loss Consulting is Right For Me?

If you are feeling overwhelmed by the loss of your cat companion or its chronic illness and are spinning your wheels trying to makes sense of it all as well as feel better, contact me to receive your FREE 15-minute Consulting Session. 

I will provide you with an introductory session so you can experience firsthand what Pet Loss Consultation can do for you. At the end of this complimentary session I will suggest what steps you might consider next in dealing with your grief.

If you feel this will work for you, you can sign up for individual or monthly appointments. In helping yourself you are also helping the all-volunteer, non-profit CARMA care for homeless companion animals and find them loving homes.

This is a complimentary, no-obligation offer so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Contact me mailto:DrSigne@LoveYourCatsInnerTiger.com

or phone at 505-867-0094 to arrange for your Complimentary 15-minute Consultation or to register for your Pet Loss Consulting. Please put "Loss" in the e-mail Subject Line.

Why Choose Dr. Signe for Your Cat Loss Consulting?

* Experience, expertise, understanding, caring & compassion

* Personalized attention

* Customized individual program

* Productive feedback

* Information, resources, advice, tips, strategies

* Convenience

* Results.

Sign up now if you want to ease your grief and loss. You deserve it.  

Know that your cat would want you to remember your life of love and fun together, not its last moments of pain.

ALL information is held in the strictest confidence.

Signe A. Dayhoff, Ph.D., mailto:DrSigne@LoveYourCatsInnerTiger.com

Phone: 505-867-0094

**Please share this with anyone you know who has suffered the trauma of losing a companion animal.